Coughing, sneezing, sore throat, runny nose, fever, headaches, diarrhea … I’m sick, seriously!
When I sick, I feel depressed and helpless. Other than suffering, my normal life is interrupted and there is nothing much I can do except taking rest. “Why me!?” I will regret why I did not eat healthier, have more rest, avoid those high risk areas and persons that get me infected, and wear sufficient clothing to keep warm. We only treasure those that we lost.
My boss may think that I applied a day of sick leave for job interview, but I don’t feel guilty about lying on my bed in the middle of the day. I can hear my neighbors next door talking, people walking outside the driveway, birds singing on the roof, dogs barking in a distance, rain falling on the ground, and trees swaying in the wind. Those sounds we normally do not pay attention as we are busy. Just like in a movie, I’m sitting still in the middle while everything in the background is moving back and forth rapidly. I’m hiding from the world, or I’m the world. And I’m drifting away.
I found myself in a cinema complex. The red LED display on top of the entrance of Cinema 1 showed, “Drama – Guarantee 8 Hours Sleep”. I turned and found the one for Cinema 2 that read, “Horror – Wake up Every Half an Hour and Scream”. There was a Cinema 3, its sign was, “Action – For Insomnia”. In a normal day, I would pick either Cinema 2 or 3. But as a patient, I thought it’s better to keep calm and have peace. So I entered Cinema 1.
The theatre was actually led to an outdoor running race and I was suddenly in my singlet, short and running shoes. The long road stretched to the front and I could not see its end point. I looked back; the road was symmetric but just stretched backwards. I then followed other people and kept running. If I was sick in real life, I might also sick in my subconscious. After a while, I felt tired. I slowed down to catch my breath. At this time, I saw the leading Kenyan runner in front. He turned, looked at me and smiled. “What the …” That’s when I woke up and soaked with sweat. Did I actually exercise in my dream?
Life sometimes can make us lose our confidence. Did your heart start to pound, your throat become dry, and your knees turn to rubber before the exam, the driving test, the job interview, and the presentation? Did you hope that the time will freeze at that moment? On the contrary, life moves on no matter we are healthy or sick, happy or sad, success or failure. Sunlight of tomorrow morning will still come and people including us will tend to forget.
Part of living and growing up is experiencing unexpected troubles in life. People lose jobs, get sick, and sometimes die in car accidents. Tragedies are rarely as bad as they seem, and even when they are, they give us an opportunity to grow stronger. Struggling with problems is a natural part of our life.
Just like our hero in the movie – defeated, lost confidence and wallowed in self-pity until renewed dedication brought him back as a mature, more kick-ass version of himself. If this was a nineties Hollywood film, it would star Tom Cruise. So, I believe I will get well soon and become stronger. For my leading Kenyan runner, I will try to run up to you next time when I feel better, no matter it’s in the dream or not.